Why yes it has been about a minute since i've contributed a handful of nouns and verbs to this here blogosphere. Per chance we've been hopping, skipping, and jumping up and down the midwest in search of five-pound bags of gummi worms. Also, quite possibly the dream of acquiring a five-pound bag of gummi worms has indeed become a reality. And what if i told you that a great deal of the contents of that aforementioned five-pound bag of gummi worms has since gone to a better place - namely my belly. I have recently realized that a five-pound bag of gummi worms leads only to a series of unsavory decisions which are not without their consequences.And since we're on the subject of father's day, mine was delightful thank you. I spent the whole day with them Jane gals. Here's what happened: Strange brew for breakfast, Children's museum (where we won a major award for tying in a rock trivia game - pictured above), Boogie burger for lunch, Ducks by the river, Half price books (where we ran into our friends the jacksons, yes those jacksons), and home for a big bowl of broccoli. Yup, broccoli. That's how i celebrate, y'all.
Later on (aka today), whilst loitering in the aisles of a bed, bath and beyond, i found myself settling deep into a shiatsu massage dealt out by a gyrating robo-chair. And no, it wasn't nearly as sexy as i'm certain it sounds. I can completely understand how 87% of all massage-related deaths are the result of overly aggressive robo-rubdown chairs. Needless to say, i was left feeling simultaneously deeply relaxed and slightly dirty. And yes, that is exactly as sexy as i'm certain it sounds. I then stumbled like a dude pretending to be more drunk than he actually is into an aisle full of vanity mirrors. Naturally, i felt right at home and began staring deep into an 8X magnification mirror. "Why on God's green earth would anyone need to see themselves up this closely," i didn't think to myself but am pretending to have thought for the sake of moving the story along. "And when did i start growing nose hairs?"
That's right, nose hairs. Real, true-to-life, honest-to-God nose hairs were scoping the lay of the land just outside my nostrils. When did this happen? Should i see this as a sign of things to come? Should i have these rogue follicles transplanted to my upper lip in attempts at manufacturing a slightly more impressive stache?
I think i'll just let these dudes find their own identity for the time being.
